1. |
Margarita Morning
03:57
|
|||
7:00 AM sun barely up
Salt on the rim of a Solo cup
Two shots tequila, a fresh-squeezed lime
Splash a little triple sec it’s stirrin’ time
All stressed out from the day to day
It’s time to wash your worries away
Tuck away your troubles, put your problems aside
And sip a margarita in the morning light
Because it’s Margarita Morning
Oh yeah!
Margarita Morning
That’s right!
Margarita Morning
You heard me!
Margarita Morning
9:00 AM goin’ strong
Drink margaritas all day long
10:00 AM tequila no more
Drunken walk to the grocery store
It goes…
Bottle number two, whoop-dee doo
I like makin’ mornin’ margaritas with you
Bottle number three, fiddle-dee dee
Make another mornin’ margarita with me
Because it’s Margarita Morning
Oh yeah!
Margarita Morning
That’s right!
Margarita Morning
You heard me!
Margarita Morning
Drinkin’ in the mornin’
Drinkin’ in the daytime
Drinkin’ well before noon
You and me baby got a great thing goin’
And there ain’t much else to do!
11:00 AM I don’t know where we are
Looks like it’s some kinda tiki bar
Vision blurred, words are slurred
Hurzzagurd is for the birds
Black out suddenly you’re in a saloon
Look at the clock it’s half past noon
Room starts spinnin’ head begins to pound
Means that it’s time for another round
On Margarita Morning
Oh yeah!
Margarita Morning
That’s right!
Margarita Morning
You heard me!
Margarita Morning
Everybody!
Margarita Morning
Oh yeah!
Margarita Morning
Just the left side!
Margarita Morning
Now the right side!
Margarita Morning
Just the back row!
Margarita Morning
Just this guy!
Margarita Morning
Everybody!
Margarita Morning
I can’t hear you…
Margarita Morning
Ok I can hear you now
Margarita Morning
One more time
Margarita Morning
One more final final
Margarita Morning
|
||||
2. |
Aliens
03:43
|
|||
Last night was really very strange
So weird you barely can explain
All you know is it wasn’t a dream
Heard a noise late in the night
Looked up, saw a flashing light
That’s when they caught you in their tractor beam
You got abducted by
Aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens from space
Told your friends, they wouldn’t believe you
They said you were probably too boozed up
Or maybe you were on LSD
You said, “No man, I was sober”
Too bad, the argument was over
You just wish that someone would believe
You got abducted by
Aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens from space
You got abducted by
Aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens from space
Took your UFO caper
To the local newspaper
They said, “Son are you on shrooms?”
When you told them all about the
Experiments, they said that they doubt ya
But you know that you told them the truth
You got abducted by
Aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens from space
You got abducted by aliens
No one believes you
You got abducted by aliens
No one believes it
But you
|
||||
3. |
||||
Beach balls in San Francisco
Fast cars and laser discos
Permanent paid vacation
Absolute inebriation
You blast into the stars, increase the danger
It started off bizarre now it’s getting stranger
You hold on tight but you’re losing your grip
So say good night because you’re starting to slip
into a
Brand new world of dance moves
A big promotion and some shiny shoes
So take a shower and dress up right
‘Cause we’re all getting drunk tonight
You’re feeling strange and so you check in the mirror
You wipe away the fog but it doesn’t get clearer
You’re giving up, your fight is done
So you can live it up because it sounds like fun
and then you
Break open a bottle of whiskey
Three more shots and we’re all getting frisky
Dinosaur pajama bottoms
It’s like Gomorrah and the city of Sodom
Just take a bottle, pour another glass
You go full-throttle, you’re going too fast
You’re doing things that can’t be done
And now you’re playing like a champion
and then you’re
Breaking down racial barriers
Blowing up aircraft carriers
Making words up as you go
Promenade and do-si-do
I sang a song that had no meaning
I hope I didn’t hurt your feelings
No matter what though you gotta admit
The first line was really the shit
I sang
Beach balls in San Francisco
Fast cars and laser discos
I hope you liked my silly song
And if you didn’t
It won’t be long ‘til it ends
|
||||
4. |
When I Grow Up
02:46
|
|||
When I was young
They asked everyone
When you grow up
What would you
Most like to do?
And Larry said he
Was going to be
A Broadway dancer
His name in lights
His legs in tights
And Mary said she
Would get a PhD
Next she’d cure cancer
Here eyes
Were on the Nobel Prize
And when they asked me
“What do you want to be?”
I knew my answer
It was better than the rest
Oh yes
Said I'd like to be
The CE
O of
A private penitentiary
Yes I’m gonna run
A for-profit prison
A publicly traded
Incarceration
Corporation
Folks’ll invest
Ha! You think that I jest?
We’ll make lots of money
On my indentured
Business venture
I can’t wait
To see my inmates
Workin’ for peanuts
No minimum wage
You’re in a cage
And guards in the yard
To force them to work hard
I’ll sell what they make
And with the profits
Buy off Congress
Make ‘em pass laws
About probable cause
Racial profiling
Search and seizure
At your leisure
Mandatory time
For nonviolent crime
Minimum sentences
Just tell the judge
He had some drugs
Convince the world that he’s a thug
Dress him in stripes
Strip his rights
Make him work all through the night
A perfect plan
That cannot fail
We’ll load up state and county jails
They’ll overflow
Where will they go?
You send ‘em to me
And I guarantee
I’ll put ‘em to work
I’ll barely pay ‘em
And I’ll profit off of their labor!
And would you believe
I had that plan made
Back in second grade
It all was so clear
I always knew
What I would do
So when they’d ask me
“What do you want to be?”
I’d look ‘em right in the eye and say,
“I know exactly what I wanna be
When I grow up”
|
||||
5. |
Lobbyist's Lament
02:08
|
|||
Hey there Mr. Senator
Won’t you lend me your ear?
I got a proposition that
You might like to hear
Mr. Senator, what’s your deal?
What can I do to grease the wheels?
The corporation’s
Breathin’ down my neck
And if I don’t pass this bill
I don’t get no paycheck
Hey there Mr. Senator
Won’t you lend me a hand?
Can’t you see that I’m an honest
Hardworking American?
Mr. Senator please be cool
I got three kids in a private school
I lost custody
In a messy divorce
And if I can’t pass this bill
I can’t pay child support
Hey there Mr. Senator
You better fall in line
Remember how I scratched your back?
Well it’s time that you scratched mine
You got your quid
Where’s my quo?
K Street is a two-way road
I got you all that money
For your campaign
So come on pass this bill
And help me make it rain
Hey there Mr. Senator
You better listen to me
I’ve got a picture that the public
Really wouldn’t like to see
But if you play ball
I promise to burn
This photo of you and your intern
Doin’ it doggy-style
On the beach
But you better pass the bill
Before the picture gets leaked
|
||||
6. |
Echo Chamber
01:56
|
|||
Echo chamber
Echo chamber
Nobody’s free
Computer algorithms
Decide what we see
Clickin’ on this
Never click that
Next thing you know
You’re only seein’ half
Of what’s going on
What’s going on
What’s going on
What’s going on?
Echo chamber
Echo chamber
You know it’s true
The internet you see
Has been tailored to you
Because you searched for that
You shopped for this
Computer algorithms
Record all the clicks
Click click
Click click
Click click
Click click!
Echo chamber
Echo chamber
Isn’t it fun?
Computers make assumptions
About everyone
Predict what you’ll think
Predict how you’ll feel
Predict what you’re gonna eat
For your next meal
Predict what you’ll click
And what you click they predict
Predict what you’ll click
And what you click they predict!
|
||||
7. |
||||
Well there’s four flamin’ horsemen comin’ out of the sky
The sun is burnin’ up right before our eyes
The people in the streets are runnin’ terrified
And there ain’t no reason to go outside
So roll another joint baby
And open up a bottle of wine
Pour some shots of whiskey darlin’
And everything’ll be just fine
There’s famine, plague, and pestilence a comin’ soon
Then a hurricane and a big monsoon
Followed by an avalanche and a typhoon
Well it looks like there’s nothin’ that we can do
But roll another joint baby
And open up a bottle of wine
Pour some shots of whiskey darlin’
And everything’ll be just fine
The radiation levels are not okay
The zombie population’s growin’ every day
Everywhere you look it’s just death and decay
So come on honey, whattaya say
We roll another joint baby
And open up a bottle of wine
Pour some shots of whiskey darlin’
And everything’ll be just fine
|
||||
8. |
||||
I got a girl and she’s just right
When we go out she’s so polite
Never rude or mean
O-oh
She’s high class, so divine
Never crass, so refined
She never makes a scene
O-oh
O-oh
All my people know what Ludacris said
I want a lady in the street and a freak in the bed
(Instrumental)
All my people know what Ludacris said
I want a lady in the street and a freak in the bed
When we’re at home she ain’t the same
She likes to play with whips and chains
She’s got a kinky streak
O-oh
She skips first base, goes right to third
And never uses a safe word
She says they’re for the weak
O-oh
O-oh
All my people know what Ludacris said
I want a lady in the street and a freak in the bed
Yes a freak in the bed
|
||||
9. |
DNA
05:13
|
|||
DNA duplicate
And randomly make
Changes to your code
DNA duplicate
And randomly make
Changes to your code
Deep within my cells
There is an ancient code
Written out in
Proteins spiraling
And determining
Things like hair color
Ah!
DNA duplicate
And replicate
A G T and C
DNA duplicate
And replicate
A G T and C
Deep within my cells
Inside each nucleus
There’s adenine
Guanine
Thymine
And cytosine
Ah!
Deep within my heart
I know my white blood cells
Are programmed with
An ancient code
To kill the things
That try to kill me
Ah!
DNA duplicate
And keep me safe
From illness and disease
DNA duplicate
And keep me safe
From illness and disease
When my skin is cut
My cells know what to do
They duplicate
Coordinate
Regenerate
My skin it’s great
Ah!
DNA duplicate
Regenerate
Certain parts of me
DNA duplicate
Regenerate
Certain parts of me
Ever since the first
Single-celled life form
You’ve been the blueprint
Of every kind of life on Earth
Everything’s related
No exceptions
Ah!
DNA
DNA
Alleluia
|
||||
10. |
Hallelujah
02:50
|
|||
Well I heard there was a secret chord
That David played and it pleased the Lord
But you don’t really care for music, do you?
It goes like this: the fourth, the fifth
The minor fall and the major lift
The baffled king composing
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her boobies and the moonlight
Overthrew ya
She tied you to a kitchen chair
Removed your pants and went down there
And with her lips
She blew ya
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Well baby I’ve done this before
And inthe mornin’ we’ll both be sore
But that’s no reason why I shouldn’t screw ya
Just strap me to the bed and next
You slap me with your sultry breasts
There’s handcuffs, gags, whipped cream
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Well I tried my best but it wasn’t much
It seems that I have lost my touch
I’m sorry that’s the way I had to do ya
But even though it all went wrong
At least I still wrote you this song
So come along, sing along with
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
|
||||
11. |
Goodbye Doug
05:14
|
|||
I said goodbye to a friend
Who wasn’t really a friend
More of a sort of acquaintance I guess
Not really an acquaintance
But more of a presence
In my life that had to go.
Oh where oh where do I start?
This story comes from my heart
But it’s not ‘bout my heart
But a different part
Now what I’m’bout to tell you
Might get uncomfortable
But I promise that there’s a point.
There was antagonizing
So very agonizing
And I’d just sit there and take it
And not say a thing
I can’t believe it took me so long
To recognize that it didn’t have to be this way.
But I knew no better nor worse
I never knew I was cursed
Because the curse was unpleasantly present from birth
The curse was named Doug
Yeah Doug is the name I gave
The thirty millimeter polyp that they found inside my colon
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Well for all of my years
I had always pooped weird
Another trip to the toilet was my biggest fear
And then one day it hit me
That possibly dairy was the
Cause of my bathroom blues.
And so I cut out the cheese
Said no more milk for me please
And no more butter or yogurt
Or coffee with cream
Eliminating lactose certainly helped
But there was still something wrong.
And so I went to my doc
And she said I’ll tell you what
I think that it’s time someone looked in your butt
A colonoscopy will get to the bottom
Of your problems on the john.
So Dr. Sheinman went in
To my sigmoidal colon
That’s where he saw Doug and his shit-eating grin
He cut that fleshy bastard out of my colon
Laughed and then he said:
“Rectum? Surgically removed ‘em!”
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
And so what was the point?
I promised there was a point
Well the point was the point was the point
What’s the point?
I know there was a reason I wanted to tell you
About my colonic polyp I named Doug.
I guess the point of my song
Is Doug was in me too long
And deep down I always knew something was wrong
But I never talked about it
‘Cause people don’t generally
Want to talk about number two.
But when you keep things inside
And you don’t swallow your pride
You’re choosing to live an uncomfortable life
So even though it’s awkward, may I suggest
You tell your doctor about your shit.
Because if you think it’s weird
Well then it’s probably weird
And I know some of you can relate to me here
You don’t have to tell me but you really should tell
Your doctor about your poo
But if you can’t afford a specialist
‘Cause our healthcare system is a mess
I don’t know what to say to you
Except sorry ‘bout your funky poo
Healthcare is a human right
But we can’t get there overnight
There’s too much paperwork involved
The problem’s just too big to solve
But if you happen to have access to
Good insurance and a doctor too
You know just the thing to do:
Talk about your stool
And maybe you’ll
Get to say:
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
Goodbye Doug
|
||||
12. |
The Pale Blue Dot
03:53
|
|||
I live on a pale blue dot
With my friends and family and the stuff I got
We're sometimes happy, we're sometimes sad
We've seen great good and tremendous bad
The people on the pale blue dot
Are sometimes friends they're sometimes not
They make love, make war, make up laws
And they'll keep making new ways to do it because
The pale blue dot
Keeps on changing
It never never stays the same
All it does is change and change
The pale blue dot
Keeps on changing
It never never stays the same
All it does is change and change
The pale blue dot
Suspended in space
Will always stay a changing place
The pale blue dot wasn't always blue
It was molten rock before me and you
It took a hundred million years
For the crust and the mantle to appear
A billion years after that
The first signs of life showed up, in fact
It took another billion more
For life to take multicellular form
And the pale blue dot
Keeps on changing
It never never stays the same
All it does is change and change
The pale blue dot
Keeps on changing
It never never stays the same
All it does is change and change
The pale blue dot
Suspended in space
Will always stay a changing place
The multi-cellular life evolved
Into stuff that flies and climbs and crawls
Creatures with a thousand legs
Things that reproduce through eggs
Monkeys smoking cigarettes
Psychedelic mushrooms, household pets
Bipedal hominid painting a cave
Neighborhood kid selling lemonade
And the pale blue dot
Keeps on changing
It never never stays the same
All it does is change and change
The pale blue dot
Keeps on changing
It never never stays the same
All it does is change and change
The pale blue dot
Suspended in space
Will always stay a changing place
One day the sun will expand
And swallow up the earth
It's a common event we've witnessed
All throughout the universe
And so I say to you
What are we going to do?
We'd better come to grips
And start building rocket ships
Or some other technology that can get us off of this planet before it's swallowed up by the sun!
So come together and
Leave the planet!
Come together and
Leave the planet!
Come together and
Leave the planet!
Come together and
Leave the planet!
Come together and
Leave the planet!
Come together and
Leave the planet!
Come together and
Leave the planet!
Come together and
Leave the planet!
|
||||
13. |
||||
This here song is a sing-along
So won’t you sing with me?
The words are easy to remember
And the melody repeats
It goes like this then it goes like that
Then does one of these
After these comes one of those
Then we move into Part Three
Part Three’s fun ‘cause it’s the part
When you shout “hooray!” (Hooray!)
You love the sing-along so much
You want to sing it every day
Now you know the sing-along
You know the words by heart
So won’t you please indulge me
And sing them from the very start?
This here song is a sing-along
So won’t you sing with me? Come on!
The words are easy to remember
And the melody repeats
It goes like this then it goes like that
Then does one of these
After these comes one of those
Then we move into Part Three
Part Three’s fun ‘cause it’s the part
When you shout “hooray!” (Hooray!)
You love the sing-along so much
You want to sing it every day
Now you know the sing-along
You know the words by heart
So won’t you please indulge me
And sing them from the very start?
Here we go!
This here song is a sing-along
So won’t you sing with me?
The words are easy to remember
And the melody repeats
It goes like this then it goes like that
Then does one of these
After these comes one of those
Then we move into Part Three
Part Three’s fun ‘cause it’s the part
When you shout “hooray!” (Hooray!)
You love the sing-along so much
You want to sing it every day
Now you know the sing-along
You know the words by heart
So won’t you please indulge me
And sing them from the very start?
Just you guys!
This here song is a sing-along
So won’t you sing with me?
The words are easy to remember
And the melody repeats
It goes like this then it goes like that
Then does one of these
After these comes one of those
Then we move into Part Three
Part Three’s fun ‘cause it’s the part
When you shout “hooray!” (Hooray!)
You love the sing-along so much
You want to sing it every day
|
Rohde Chicago, Illinois
A ukulele-playing combination of "Weird Al" Yankovic and Jimmy Buffett no one asked for.
Streaming and Download help
Bandcamp Daily your guide to the world of Bandcamp